Not in the mood.

That's right I'm not in the mood. I am forcing myself to wrte this because I feel I should write something, even if there is nothing to say.
Maybe it will make me feel better but I doubt it. Lately it has been like water is rising to my mouth and I am trying to gulp air as I choke on water. It kills me to breathe because i feel like I am suffocating.

I know the drama is stifling isn't it? Yes. I'll answer for you, it is. I think I am keyboard dislexic. I must be. I was just telling a friend of mine about how I must be the only writer that can't type. You would think that after 20 years of working daily on a computer that I would be able to type like a 1950's secretary, but no its like someone cut off all of my fingers at the first knuckle with a tree pruner.

I was visiting tshirthell.com and I saw this shirt that said "autistic kids rock" - there was a picture of a kid rocking back and forth like autistic kids do. I laughed my fucken head off and then I felt really bad for laughing. Rotten. Why are we all so rotten? Sure I tell myself that I was laughing because of the clever use of the pun but I doub't I am being truthful with myself. Go to the site and see for yourself - i am not condoning it - but there will be something there you will laugh at that you shoudn't be.

I suck my tongue in remembrance of you. Bjiork said that. is it a girl thing cause I don't get it. Do you? Gee I guess i really do have something to say - funny how that goes - the times I find myself not wanting to write are usually the times I write the best.

Boy am I ever an asshole.

Not it the mood. Pretentious huh?